I guess most of us, when we think about it a little, will accept that we are close to ourselves in our personal and business relationships yet at the same time we are different individuals as well.
When I refer to personal relationships, I mostly mean our behaviours among our family and close friends; when I refer to business relationship, I mean our thoughts and behaviours among our working friends at the work place. I not only talk about our behaviours but at the same time our thoughts and mindscape that shape these behaviours.
All of us were taught according to Newton’s intellectual framework and we began to express and build our thoughts and expectations in this way. Only if there is an outer stimulant then there will be change on the inside. Only if a person that is completely strange to us lets us go on first on a way then we can feel positive feelings such as thankfulness and love to the stranger.
For centuries, Oriental science has responded to efforts of West’s science, which seeks conceptual, theoretical connection and evidence, with efforts that seeks human in the inner self. In the West, human that seeks himself between the lines has observed human in the East that meditates and looks to inner self and has begun to do the same. The East has begun to read the books of the West and has presented itself and its seeking to society among the West’s ordinate but transcendental numbers as well.
We were more like ourselves in our personal relationships and we acted as we wanted. We were less worried and afraid of making a mistake or being misunderstood. Was it the same in our business relationship? As our expectations increased, we have begun to measure our sentences and behaviours inch by inch. We were afraid of making a mistake yet when we witnessed others’ fault, we felt quite well. We fantasized that we are the most perfect creatures of the evolution but we didn’t believe in it for a second.
When the situation is like that don’t we need to stop and think for a second? Did the equations that have made the West and the East come closer but distances our inner self and outer self arise from the same source? Did we create these different behaviour patterns or did we acquire these patterns by mimicking the previous ones as much as we could observe?
Let’s make the subject more personal just here and let’s look at how the brain-emotion-body triplet works:
Three different chemical types that have action-reaction chemicals for the brain activity and bodily functions, and that is named as Ligand (means to connect in Latin) build connection with cell in millisecond, have interaction with it and affects the cell. 
You can imagine the neurotransmitters as the chemical messengers that come from brain and mind, which are privileged, and make brain communicate with the neural system, the neuropeptides as the chemical signal senders which are the bridge between brain and body and make us feel like we think, and hormones as the chemicals related with the emotions in the body primarily.
For example, when we think about a project before we begin to work on it, three of the chemicals begin to operate. Neurotransmitter draws a mental map of our thoughts. Later, according to the frame of the thoughts, related neuropeptides mix with the blood by passing through pituitary gland and activate the hormones. In short, thoughts that we created in our brain stimulate our emotions and reach into the body. Although this mechanism defines the operation, it gives a little clue about the source and the reasons of the operation.
If we go back to our question, can we say that our mindscapes and behaviours in our relationships are formed in our internal environment? Even, whatever the features that are genetically inherited from our family and engraved in our cells we cannot change them much and we manifest conscious-unconscious emotion, thought and behaviours according to this.
If you asked me this question, perhaps, in the 18th century, I would say that dominant genetic features that inherited from family affect our whole life and our behaviour pattern; and I would thank reproachfully to my mother and father who made me who I am today. The reason for my reproach might be that they did not produce a more flawless offspring. Undoubtedly, in those times I would believe that personal endeavour and circumferential factors affect me so little.
Who knows, maybe I go back to 400s or 500s B.C. and I would give Pythagorean’s ‘patrocline’ hypothesis as an example, which supposes that the seed formed me comes from the father. Also I could have told you that even Empedocles said my seed comes from my mother and father. 
Epigenetic, supra genetic, is a science branch which explains how environment controls the gene activity and tells that our inherited DNAs do not control our entire life, and examines that we can have totally new results with the same DNAs by only changing our thoughts, emotions and emotional reactions and our behaviours.
Then can we say that it is time to give up expostulate on our mother and father? We should say; because, the West responded scientifically to the East’s ‘transform yourself by returning to your inner self’ messages and told that we can choose what we can be.
In this stage there is a whole different question: Who am I?
Am I the person who talks to myself in the inside? Am I the person in the personal relationships? Or am I the person in the business relationship? At this point, telling you that who you are exceeds the frame of this article.
However, we can say that: Whoever you are, do not wait world or people to change, to get promoted, or being rich etc. in order to change a feature that you are not pleased with. Change in your thoughts will create the change in your emotions. Change in your emotions will affect your body and after a while it will show its impact until you think and become as you want to be. This makes future come to you and become as you have imagined today.
Actually, we are the persons who we want to be in our personal life or our business relationship. If we see a difference between them, we should seek the reasons not in our environment, our superior’s distant or our inferior’s frivolous manners but in ourselves. Because if we do not think, act and be perceived as we are or as we want to be, the reason is neither our genes nor our friends that surround us or our work mates.
Personal transformation techniques is a candidate to be another article’s subject. It is also necessary to give an advice to prepare brain-emotion-body triplet to render the transformation. A breath-based meditation that you do by sparing at least five and at most thirty minutes every day will be opening the door that make you reach the person you are seeking for. I recommend you to read the articles about the meditation that Fast Company team do every morning in order to increase different thinking, their creativity and awareness. Link
Where do you stand at being yourself at your work place?
as written on cemsari.co